Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
