my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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