I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
