i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize