Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize