she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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