Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Congratulations! We have a period
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