Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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