butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
