Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
