What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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