So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
