I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
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