How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
