they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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