on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
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