Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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