Will you blow on my dice?
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
