So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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