Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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