I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Randomize
