well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
