So drunk its hurt
I could make wine with my vomit
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Randomize
