Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize