You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
