Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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