it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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