Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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