He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
