I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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