bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
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