Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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