I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Randomize