remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
You've changed since you got that strap on
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
