I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
