Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
