If i come over, it means nothing
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
