Have you finally orgasmed yet?
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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