By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
