My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
