Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize