She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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