Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
