The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
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