she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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