you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Congratulations! We have a period
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
