that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Randomize
