Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I just had sex on a roof
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
