So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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