If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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